Category: the Rant Board
hello there,
its come to my knowledge that you, the members on the zone, apparently no longer believe a word i say. well okay to be perfectly honest thats fine, what you think and believe is your business. however, before you convict me i would like to give my own testamony to the jury in the hope for, what is that professional term, oh yeah "COMPASSION".
OKAY, you want to know who i am fine here goes.
My name is Jack Adam Spock Mills, 18 born in London now living in Kent, South East England. At the age of two I was sent to the nursery at DORTON HOUSE SCHOOL for thbe blind in Seal, near Sevenoaks. From 2 until 16 I was at that place. It had its good times and it had its bad, but, so does everything else.
See my problem was/is I hate crowds, strange eh, an actor hatting crowds, well, its true. So I never went out my way to make friends. However, I did. I seemed to always have friends. Friends that were richer, better, and more fun than I was. At ten my friends had all the latest fasionable clothing, toys, games computers even, me what did I have? I have my hand ya down clothes, hand ya down toys and my favourite a book. I love reading I always have done, its who I am. I didn’t complain though because I didn’t need all that I just need my books and the odd friend or two. After a while though I began hating not having what my mates did, I will admit it, I was an intelligent child, but, I was a poor one. To here my fries talking about the latest stuff always made me uncomfortable so in the end I began to lie. You know just saying I had it all. Saying I had all the latest stuff saying how rich I was. Big of me wasn’t it. Answer NO. not at all. However I wanted my friends. I ned them. I had gone from hating crowds to loving them. I needed them! Well then It was just me lying just one. But, course one lead to another and then another then another. In the end my life was to me one big lie. One big piece of shit. And I hated it. While this was happening we were having problems at home with my parents (but, I’m not going into that coz that personal) but, this didn’t help. In the space of one year two family members died and my at the time girlfriend died. FANTASTIC wasn’t that life great!!!!!!!
I found it easier to lie in the end. Found it easier to hid behind a mask and not sow my true self. You see my true self is a sad,. Lonely and a little bitter. For years now I have bottled things up in side, kept all emotion deep in.
16 I fell in love with my, at the time student. P.E. teacher, shewas taking us as part of her course because she was studying at Dorton college, which was down the road from the school. Well while dating her I was in love. We got engaged after three months. Like all relationships we had our troubles. However, in the end we broke up and I can honestly say I was heart broken. See one of the reason she said she had broken up with me was because she said I had raped her twice. Believe what you want but, I didn’t. depite what type of barstard you think I am I would do that not to anyone. That hurt, hurt more than anything in the world. I’ve never been good with women they come and go it seems but, this time I thought hell it just might work but, hell I was wrong. Well I graduated school and came to the RNC in Hereford hoping to start a fresh with everything. But, alas didn’t happen.. see I’ve found I places like RNC and Dorton you have to be a certain type of person to be, how would they say it, “in with the crowd”. I weren’t that type. I was and still am a person who thought what he said and said what he thought. I weren’t rich and I weren’t looking for friends just wanted to do my course and go. Well I made my enemies like this and some friends but, d you know ask me to name one friend I can trust and I couldn’t answer you coz I don’t trust them. Not all. I have a trust issue ya see. So back on went the mask and back was jack the lying shit! Well this is my second ear, I hope to get a third next year to finish of my business psychology and critical thinking. With these under my belt I plan to attend one of two places. Either the university of Essex for Performing arts. My true love or Oxford for law or criminal psyc.
Well their ya go just a brief look but, that’s all your getting. In the end I’m a private person and hate talking about myself. On here I can’t even be myself. There are days on here when I’m me the true me but, mostly I’m the other me the one who hides his emotions and don’t really give a shit what people think of him. But, of course I do. Me the one writing this, me the real jack I give a sit.
So think what you want. Do what you want.
I came on here to make friends but, its seems my past can’t even leave me alone.
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury I rest my case and apologise to you all.
I’m so sorry!
Mr J A S Mills
A little bitter mate I've heard less bitterness from victims of Auschwitz..you need to grow up and damned fast...
i believe i have already stated i am a "LITTLE BITTER" but, thats me.
just to say. i'll understand if people don't wish to talk to me now. i just ask that they look at it form my possition. thank you
Well, I still care, and understand. Hugs. Message me sometime Kay?
woah buddy if you feel the need to vent send me a PM. I don't know you and you don't know me. But I know where you're coming from. I don't trust people online anymore then I have to. But I understand your frustrations.
Listen mate from the sound of things you need some counselling,to face and come to terms with, what has happened because this bitterness and anger is highly destructive.And by posting your anger on here, you have displayed the depth of your pain to those who enjoy ripping into those who are vulnerable...you can either allow this problem to deteriorate to the point where it will not improve, or you can see it as an opportunity to help yourself recover its in your hands mate I wish you luck...All the best Alex.
I'm sorry, Jack. But u know I'm with u. I always will.
Clara
i care you cause you are one of my lovely brother here. as long as you have do your best, do not care what other people said about it. we are always here to support you and care you. hugshugs
Hey Jack, I'm really feeling sad for you and I do care. Honestly, if you need someone to talk to or just chat, I'm always here. I'll be here very often now, so, I'll be glad to listen to you.
I don't trust the majority of the human race at all so this anger is understandable
In response to post 1 ... So fucking what! Life isn't easy. Get over yourself, Stop feeling sorry for yourself, wine wine wine, that's all I hear and this is supposed to be from an adult? Man you really need to get a grip. If you think you've had it hard so far, you've obviously experienced nothing yet!
Yes but he still has the right to tell us when some people think something bad of him, or not?
WEll, if he's been lying all this time, about going to Oxford etc, how can we know he's telling the truth this time, is this just another lie then?
Why do you think he's lying, anyway?
Well, because he claimed he got accepted into Oxford on public quick notes, because eh said in his initial post he used lies time and time again until they took over his life eehm, well, so how is this different? I don't think he is necessarily I'm just wondering why he wants to say all those things and pointing out that there is no evidence that heisn't lying again.
Well, then it is a first step made, when he can admit it.
And, only because of that, you can#t say he is always lying. And what'swrong with claiming he is accepted in Oxford? Do you know it is wrong? can you prove it?
Eehm because he was proved wrong by loads of people in quick notes who know him, his spelling and grammar gives it away, people who write like that are not accepted to Oxford, sorry, but this is a fact, it's really hard to get in there and if you look at his first post in this toic he does not mention it anywhere, in fact he mentions Sussex I believe and says his dream is to go to Oxford, if he had been accepted or was in the process of applying wouldn't he say so.
Hm, okay, I have to give up about that. Still, this doesn#T prove that he always lies.
doesn't prove that he doesn't either.
he posted this post basically admitting to being a compulsive lier, not because he now felt bad about what he'd done, but because he'd been exposed by users who know him personally. if this hadn't come to light, would he have said anything? one would imagine perhaps not.
Yup once a liar, always one. And he did something I've never seen anyone do before: Come clean of lying. First I've seen such a admission on a public message board. And yet he hasn't responded to any of our posts in this topic. I agree though with Wildbrew why should we trust The Doc if he lied once. He'll lie again, and I don't know if this person will even kick the habit. I understand The Doc is feeling lonely, he wants attention but um, lying isn't the way to go about it. Masking your identity isn't the way to go either.
ah no, lying and masking your identity is not a good way to gain attention, but posting a message on the boards admitting to all your faults is a very good way to gain attention. Because for so many, that kind of post will gain you a sympathy vote...
Nor is pissing everyone around you off! A few members of the Zone know him personally, and I can tell you that he's only got himself to blame for the reputation he has!
i didn't know the doctor! so only got to know of him threw this site and when i meet somebody like that, so far as i am concerned, they have to earn my respect! he told a huge lie, with the express purpose of impressing people and that kind of blatent dishonesty doesn't wash with me!
one more thing! if anybody does want to try and fool me with a lie please try and make it a plausible one!
Yeah I've had internet friends mask their idenities before and lie til their blue in the face. This is why I take any info these days that people give me over the net with a grain of salt.
Something else which occured to me, if he's the doctor, then surely he knows the solution to his problem.
This is just a username. It doesn#T mean that he knows the solution.